Wednesday, October 7, 2009

Membership to the Group

Something about San Francisco makes me a self conscious bride to be. Maybe it's that we're living off a street that is so baby-centic, it makes me hyper aware of being a part of a group. I am The Bride Group. I am the Paper Source Group. I am ruin every one's life over superfluous things group. I'm THAT group.

But I'm not, right? Right? There are separate groups within the Group? I'm being too hard on the Group?

I think it was the Yelp reviews that did me in. I'm all for store reviews, but something about all the negative comments about the Papyrus or Paper Source stores seemed petty. Someone complained that the tiles were loose in one of the stores. But said it in a way that seemed really unnecessary (to my clearly overly sensitive brain.) Some definitely have valid complaints. But reading them all en mass, the valid ones, the petty ones, all just seemed overwhelming artificial. So much of wedding culture is fake. Fake want. Fake desire. Not that the emotions aren't real, but the whole groundwork of why we have those emotions is manufactured. Has been manufactured. Manufactured want and need. And most sadly, manufactured feelings of entitlement.

I go through phases. In some, I explode in excitement. And in others, I want to pull back and hide in my self consciousness. Today was the latter. Yes. Clearly.


  1. Do you mean that because weddings are being used as a marketing tool?
    I've had to take a long hard look as to why I want a wedding and what it really means and blah blah blah. Unfortunately, I'm a product of my culture and many of the petty things, I want, but I want it to have meaning. I want both! But that is just me and I'm only one half of the marriage. So for now, I'll let things be, but once that ring is on my finger, its time to do some deep deep thinking.

  2. Sometimes I just get uncomfortable as soon as I realize I'm part of a defined group. B/c then I begin to see the stereotypes of that group and wonder if I'm one of those. Or that those stereotypes are reflecting poorly on me. Like I love so much of hipster culture but if I ever thought I was a part of that culture (and this teal hoody says I never will be) I'd be horrified b/c suddenly I'd think about all the ways I type cast and think poorly of hipsters.

    That's part 1. Just being part of a group. Part 2 is yeah, I think a lot of what people feel they need at weddings is manufactured. Just the way I feel like fear of germs is manufactured or everyone feeling like they need an iphone. Only it's not an individual thing, it's an event.